Those who have experienced military combat say a person can never know what the experience is really like - unless they’ve done it. After talking with a lot of our military, I came away with a new appreciation for the truth that some things in life must be experienced first hand. There is no substitute. 

That applies, as well, with fighting in the octagon. You can watch every UFC match recorded. But until you hear the octagon gate slam behind you, and stand barefooted on the mat looking into the eyes of your adversary… well, you just have to be there. 

I can tell you this – the octagon is, first and foremost, a very unforgiving place to spend some time. A moment’s lack of concentration, a mistaken punch here or missed kick there, and it’s over. Hopefully over for the other guy – but over. 

Fighting in the UFC is life exaggerated. That’s the best way I can put it. Daily, ordinary life sometimes presents all of us with harsh tests, with moments of do-or-die. But in the octagon it is unrelenting, every second – and many thousands are watching you. 

Fans ask me what it feels like to slip out of a Ken Shamrock foot lock or absorb an Anderson Silva strike. I can describe these situations in detail, but I know there is only so much I really can impart. 

At the bases in Iraq, I asked a lot of questions of our soldiers, trying to get a feel for their lives. What it’s like to risk dismemberment or death with every transport on every road? In the end, I knew I would never fully comprehend their anxieties, their emotions, and their struggles. 

The best we can hope for is to at least know that, try as we may, when circumstances are exaggerated, when life is extreme, the only way you can really know is to experience it yourself. Appreciating that we have limited understanding can keep us humble. 

There are lots of things I fear in life – and not just a savage strike coming my way at 100 mph. Of course I fear the same things everyone else does – a life-altering diagnosis, the drunk driver crossing into my lane, the phone call telling me someone I really care about has died. 

But it is true that when it comes to the octagon, fear is part of the process. Failure to manage this powerful emotion gives your opponent a huge advantage just for showing up. 

Just before my fight career had started, I was in an amatuer boxing contest in Cincinnati. My opponent had nearly a 40 pound weight advantage and was 3 inches taller than me. I was nervous and the crowd seemed to anticipate my doom. 

In the end, the referee stopped the fight in the 3rd round, and raised my hand in victory. This experience helped teach me to keep my fear in check and make it work for me as an energizing force. 

Being brave isn’t about not being scared. It’s about doing your best in spite of it.